After an unforgettable week in Melbourne with my sister Jo and her gorgeous pooch, Millie, I jetted off back to Sydney, with my daughters, reflecting on what fun we’d had and the new adventures we had experienced, feeling a deep sense of love and connection to family.
As we began to settle in, I looked over at my eldest daughter, Stella, and saw her quietly sobbing. I reached over to hold her hand and asked her what was wrong. She replied “I am going to really miss Auntie Jo, Mummy”…and once again the gates opened to floods of tears. My initial reaction would have been to try and calm her down, and immediately shift her attention to something else, but something was telling me that this was a learning opportunity for her…and ultimately for me as well.
I asked Stella what she was thinking about that was making her so upset. Initially, she couldn’t really tell me. So we sat together in her grief, for a few moments. I slowly started to explain that when we think about what we don’t have and what we have lost…we can get lost in the sadness of it all. So I gently encouraged her to think about the things she enjoyed about our trip and what she had to look forward to when we got home. Her energy began to shift and the tears eventually slowed, as if the sadness had been felt completely and was now allowed to move on.
After some time, I asked Stella what had changed for her and she said “Mummy, I am thinking happy thoughts now and these are happy tears!” My heart melted. I saw her awareness shift, as if a light bulb had gone off in her head. The happy tears eventually eased and Stella became her bouncy self again.
Stella’s experience was another reminder to me about the importance of honouring our negative feelings when they pop up, and gently guiding ourselves back to better feeling thoughts. The more we practise this, the easier it gets. However, it’s not always easy to do this on our own, so seeking support from someone close can really help us bounce back from a negative feeling place.
There is an intrinsic link between the thoughts we think, the way we feel and the emotional and spiritual energy we generate. By choosing our thoughts with care, we can create the positive energy we need to shape the life we want. It’s the Bounce Effect!